George - Chapter Nineteen: Welcome Home

Three days had passed since I had interviewed for the job at the hospital. I hadn’t expected to hear anything immediately following it, but as the days went by I found that I was more and more anxious about hearing from them. I hadn’t realized how much I wanted the job until I told Steph about it and once I realized it, I had trouble thinking about much else.

One thing that helped keep my mind occupied was packing. I had returned again to Appaloosa to finish packing up the last of my stuff. The next time I returned to Bridgeport it was for good. Steph, Ethan, and Charlotte were coming in two days to help pack the last little bit of my things and then the next day my stuff was going in storage at Bridgeport until the new apartment was ready. We still had at least two weeks before we could move in; in the meantime, I was going to be staying at Steph’s place. As I was finishing packing up a box, I heard my phone ring. I hurried over to answer it but was baffled by who it was. I didn’t recognize the number but it had the same area code as Bridgeport and even though I normally didn’t answer numbers I didn’t recognize, I chose to this time.

“Hello?”

“Dr. Davila?”

“Yes. . .”

“This is Dr. Stewart at Mercy West Hospital.”

I immediately straightened. “Oh, Dr. Stewart. . .How are you?” I asked not really knowing what else to say.

“I’m good. Listen, I wanted to tell you that we really appreciate you coming in to interview for the job.”

I cringed as I waited to hear the ‘but.’ “I was glad for the opportunity.” I said holding my breath for what was to come next.

“Glad to hear it since we’d like to offer you the job.”

I started to say ‘Thank you for considering me,’ believing that he was going to tell me they had chosen someone else, but I quickly stopped myself. “I’m sorry. . .you’re offering me the job?” I was sure I had heard him wrong.

“Yes. After talking with you and some of the references on your resume, we feel that you’d be a great fit here.”

“Wow. Umm. . .” I was never speechless and here I was struggling for words with my now boss. “That’s great!” I finally managed to get out.

“Can you start in a week and a half? We would normally do two weeks but we’ve been without a third psychologist for a couple months.”

“That would be great! I’ll be permanently in Bridgeport after this weekend so it works out perfectly for me.”

“Great! We’ll need you to come in sometime early next week to sign some papers. Just send me an email and we can figure out a good time for that. Looking forward to working with you, George.”

“You too.”

I hung up the phone and stood in the middle of living room staring at the floor pondering how much things had changed in the last three months. Steph and I were together, I was moving to Bridgeport, we had gotten a place together, and I now had a job that I was thrilled to have. It all pointed back to Steph and I had the uncontrollable urge to call her.

I impatiently waited as I listened to the ringing and nearly jumped when she answered.

“Hey lover.” I smiled from her calling me by her recent nickname for me and I wished more than anything that I was there with her.

“Hi Sunshine.”

“Are you packing?”

“I was, until I got a call from the hospital. . .”

I heard what sounded like scurrying. “What did they say? They offered you the job, didn’t they?”

“What makes you so sure?”

“They’d be stupid to not, George.” I was overwhelmed by her belief in me.

“They offered me the job, I sign the papers early next week and then start the next Monday.”

I heard her squeal. “We’ll have to celebrate after you get here!”

I closed my eyes and imagined that I was there with her, watching her face light up when I told her that I got the job. “God, I wish I was there.” I whispered.

“Just two more days until we see each other. . .” She gently whispered back. “. . .and then after that, we’ll be together every day.”

I moaned. “I’m just going to keep on packing. As long as I do that, I might be able to distract myself.”

She chuckled. “At least you have that; I can’t pack up all my stuff yet.”

“You could just come here early. . .” I hinted.

She laughed. “I wish. Two more days; it’ll be here before you know it.”

Unfortunately, the next two days went by at a turtle’s pace. I had packed almost everything by the time Steph, Charlotte, and Ethan arrived. I stepped outside when I saw Ethan pull up, and the second he stopped the car, Steph jumped out and ran to me, almost knocking me down as she wrapped her arms around my neck and started kissing me.

I heard Charlotte chuckle and I looked over Steph’s shoulder at her. “Something funny?” I jokingly asked.

“Just remember, I get credit.”

“What? What is she talking about?” Steph wondered.

“Nothing; she’s just being the pestering sister she’s always been.” I playfully narrowed my eyes at Charlotte.

“That’s only because you’re a bothersome brother.” She countered.

I nodded. “And just think, I’m moving to the same city as you, what fun that will be. . .” I joked.

Ethan chuckled and shook his head. “You two don’t ever stop, do you?”

“Nope.” We both said at the same time.

“Let’s go inside.” Steph suggested as she grabbed my hand and we all walked in together.

“Oh. . .”Charlotte said as we entered the living room.

“What?” I asked.

“It’s just. . .so bare.” Steph added.

I looked around and nodded. “I guess since I’ve seen it like this for several days I hadn’t thought about it. I’m just glad that Amelia is going to be living here; makes me feel better knowing that someone in the family will be here.”

“Still, it’s a little sad, isn’t it?” Charlotte asked.

I honestly hadn’t felt that way; I was so ready to move to Bridgeport that I hadn’t thought much about that I was leaving Appaloosa. “Not really.” I admitted. “I’ll miss the ranch and being able to see Mom whenever, but there’s something even better in Bridgeport.” I said as I reached down to hold Steph’s hand. I turned my head and looked at her and she rested her head on my shoulder.

“You two are just too frigin’ cute!” She grinned but her expression was soon replaced with a grieved look. “I wish Trev was here.”

All of us nodded. “Yeah. Next week; he’s supposed to come home next week.” I said.

“Do you think he’s ready?” Ethan asked.

I shrugged. “I have no idea. I think if they thought he wasn’t, they would advise him to stay longer. He was only going to stay six weeks but they suggested to him that he stay a couple more and he agreed. So it sounds like they’re okay with him leaving now after eight.”

“Do you think he’ll be okay?” Steph worried.

“Again, I don’t know. I’ve only talked to my friend a couple times since he’s not technically supposed to be even telling anyone anything about Trev. It’s only been, ‘He’s good and making progress.’ But part of me hopes that since he’s staying the two extra weeks that he’s trying this time. The last two times, he couldn’t get out of there fast enough. He never would have agreed before to stay the extra time.”

There was a silence for several minutes before Steph broke it. “Should we do something when he comes home? A little dinner get-together?” We looked at her and I couldn’t help but smile thinking about how she never stopped thinking about others.

“I think that would be a great idea.” I admitted. “I know his apartment still has some alcohol in it. I had planned to go this next week and straighten some things up that I hadn’t in the previous weeks. We could get some things together; you and I could cook. . .” I suggested to Steph and she nodded. “You and Ethan could help with decorations; nothing elaborate, just enough for a nice dinner with all of us.” they agreed too. “It would be nice if Mom could be there too.”

“Be where?” I heard Mom ask and saw her walk up behind Steph. “Sorry, I couldn’t resist barging in one last time.” She smiled at me and I felt sad for a moment. I was really going to miss seeing Mom as often as I had the last year.

“We thought it might be nice to have a little dinner for Trev when he comes home. Do you think you might be able to come next Friday?” Charlotte asked.

“Oh, I think that’s a wonderful idea! I can be there Friday afternoon; does that work?”

“I think so.” I said and we all agreed.

“Speaking of dinner, everyone’s still coming to the house right? I don’t think you could cook here even if you wanted.” Mom wondered.

“Yeah, if you all are ready, we can go ahead and head to Mom’s, since it’s so barren here.” I joked.

We followed Mom back to her house and as we walked in I felt the need to look around. I knew I would be back after this, but it would be different, I wouldn’t have driven the two minutes it took to get from my house to hers, she wouldn’t have called me asking if I wanted to stop by for dinner that night. 

I walked over to one of the family pictures that was hanging on the wall and looked at it. I could clearly remember the day that the picture had been taken; how there hadn’t been a cloud in the sky and we had all complained how instead of spending the day doing all the different things we each wanted to do, we were stuck at home dressed up for pictures. Trev had been the most vocal, complaining that he needed to practice for an upcoming game and Dad finally tried to reason with him that there wouldn’t be many more opportunities for us to have a family picture taken. Little had we known that two weeks later, Dad wouldn’t be with us anymore. 

But thanks to this picture, I was able to look back at this one moment in time, with Dad smiling with his arms around Mom, and the four of us, closer than we would be in the next almost ten years. I knew our family would never be the way it was before; it just wasn’t possible, but I had hoped that we would all learn to adjust to our lives without Dad. I looked over at Charlotte and smiled realizing that after years of hoping that she would, it had finally happened for her. I looked back at the picture and at Trev, longing for him to get to that point too, the point where he could finally accept what had happened and learn to live his life without Dad.

I felt a pair of arms wrap around me and leaned back into her. “You look the same, except shorter and you’re lacking facial hair.” She joked.

I nodded and we continued to stand there looking at the picture. “When was this taken?” She quietly asked.

“Two weeks before the accident.” I whispered.

“Doesn’t it hurt to look at it?” She wondered.

I nodded. “It does, but it also makes me smile. We had a lot of fun times as a family, in this house. . .” I trailed off and turned around to face her.

“George, are you okay? If you aren’t sure about. . .”

“I’m sure.” I reassured her. “I’ve never been more sure about anything; I’ll miss Appaloosa, but my home is definitely with you in Bridgeport.”

She buried her head into my chest and we stood there hugging for several moments before I realized that Mom, Charlotte, and Ethan were looking over at us with quizzical expressions. I nodded to let them know that everything was okay and they continued talking.

She eventually lifted her head and looked at me. “I love you.”

I stroked her cheek. “I love you too.”

We slowly made our way into the living room where we all chatted before sitting down for dinner where the conversation turned to Charlotte and Ethan’s quickly approaching wedding.

“So you’ve found your dress, how about the bridesmaid dresses? What color are you forcing Steph to wear?” Mom joked.

“I think I finally decided on a light blue, not a bright light blue though.”

“That will be so pretty, and I’m sure Steph will look beautiful in it!” Mom voiced her approval.

“Steph looks beautiful in anything.” It was out of my mouth before I could even think about what I was saying. I quickly looked over at Steph and while her cheeks were slightly blushed, she was smiling.

I felt a slight kick on my leg and looked over at Charlotte. She looked down at her left ring finger and started lightly taping it on the table as she smiled. I rolled my eyes at her and then quickly looked at Steph to see if she had noticed. She and Ethan were talking and hadn’t seen Charlotte’s and my exchange; but as I looked over at Mom, it was obvious that she had. She was looking between Charlotte and me with a smile that showed almost every tooth.

“So, have you figured out where in Bridgeport you’re going to get married?” I asked trying to get the attention back to Charlotte.

“I think we finally decided on the indoor park. That way we won’t have to worry if it rains.” Ethan stated.

 “What about the honeymoon?” Steph wondered.

“Well, we had actually thought about Paradise Island. Is there still talk of everyone meeting there at the end of June?” We all nodded and Ethan continued. “We would be on our honeymoon one week and then the next meeting up with the family for vacation. We figured we’d just take a two week honeymoon there with the second week being the family get-together.”

“We could move the get-together. . .” Mom suggested.

“No, it really works out perfectly. It would be much harder to take a week off for the honeymoon and then a week later within the next month.” Charlotte explained.

“I can’t believe that we’re all going to be together in a month and a half!” Mom exclaimed. “This is such an exciting time for everyone.”

We finished eating and spent several hours at Mom’s sitting in the living room talking before Steph and I returned to the house. Charlotte and Ethan were meeting us back there the next morning to help clean and with last minute packing. I had decided to stay at the house one last night, for old times’ sake.

We were up early the next morning, cleaning, packing, and trying to finish everything before the moving truck arrived. When it finally did, they loaded all the boxes into the truck to take them to a storage place in Bridgeport. When we had finished cleaning, we stood in the middle of the living room looking around at the completely bare space. 

“I think Amelia’s going to be happy here.” Mom offered.

I nodded. “I hope so. She seems really excited. She technically owns it now but since she wasn’t going to be back in town for another week, I was able to stay a little longer.”

Everyone took one last look around the downstairs and then walked out the front door. I locked it and handed Mom the key. “I told Amelia that you’d give the key to Uncle Charlie, is that okay?”

“Sure.” She said quietly. I handed her the key and we hugged for several moments. “Be careful driving.” She said and then hugged Steph. “All of you, be careful.” She continued as she hugged Charlotte and Ethan. She had always said the same thing every time one of us drove after Dad’s accident.

“We will.” Charlotte told her.

“We should get going if we’re going to make it before dark.” I suggested. We all said goodbye to Mom one last time and walked to our cars. 

I placed the cat carriers in the car and then stopped and looked one last time at the Hobble Ranch. I noticed someone standing next to me and I looked over at her to give her a reassuring smile. She inched closer and placed her head on my shoulder while I wrapped an arm around her waist and we both continued to look over at the massive ranch. Ever since I had moved back to Appaloosa, I had wondered what I would feel if I ever moved away again; thinking maybe I would feel a little sad or maybe even nostalgic, but what I felt at the moment was nothing like what I imagined. It was a feeling of thankfulness; thankful that I had been able to grow up in that town with my family, thankful that I had a place that that no matter what happened, I could go back to. I looked down at Steph and remembered that she hadn’t had that; she couldn’t go back to where she grew up and have those experiences. I pulled her even closer and she looked up at me. “Let’s go home.” I said to her and she smiled at me. 

After she got in the car, I quickly went back over and hugged Mom one last time, before getting into the car. As we pulled away from the house, we waved one last time at Mom and then turned our attention to the road ahead, the road leading home.

As happy that Steph and I were that we were finally together every day, we still didn’t feel settled. We were scheduled to move into the new apartment two weeks after I moved to Bridgeport which meant that Steph and I were busy running around buying last minute furnishings and items for the apartment and also packing Steph’s stuff up to move. In the midst of all of that, Trev was coming home from rehab and I was supposed to report to the hospital to sign papers and go through an orientation for the job I would soon start.

The first thing I tackled was the work orientation and signing of papers, which was easy after the date and time was set up. The orientation was pretty informative and went through hospital procedures and protocol and while I was there, I also had lunch with Dr. Stewart and the other doctor I would work with, Dr. Franklin. They both invited me to come back the next day and follow them around to get a feel for exactly what the job entailed. Whereas I had spent the whole day in an office in Appaloosa, I quickly realized that wasn’t necessarily going to be the case here. I would have patients that I saw in my office, but we were essentially on call while we were at the hospital, and if the hospital felt an individual needed one of us, we were paged and one of us would go where needed. I was then shown my office, which I was surprised looked out at the city and was also a decent size. I was excited to start the job the following Monday, but there was another big event that was happening before that.

Trev was due to come home that Friday and to say we were all nervous about it would have been an understatement. We were still on for the little dinner that night, but as it approached, we wondered if it was such a good idea, that maybe he would want to be alone when he got home. Steph and I were talking about it when I heard my phone ring. I recognized the number as the rehab facility and picked up in a slight panic.

“Hello?” I nervously asked.

“Hey baby brother.”

I stood frozen from shock for a moment. “Trev?” Steph stopped what she was doing and whirled around; I nodded to let her know that it really was him.

“Yeah. How are you?” He asked and sounded like his normal self, not at all like he had the night he had gone to the hospital.

“I’m. . .good. . .How are you?” The words stumbled out since I was still in shock that I was actually talking to him.

“I’m good. Listen, I didn’t drive here so I don’t have a car.  I have no problem taking a cab or taxi service, but I was wondering if maybe you could pick me up Friday?”

“Sure. I can do that.”

“I know it’s a drive from Appaloosa. . .”

“Actually, Trev, I’ll be driving from Bridgeport.”

“Oh. . .really?” I felt bad for Trev; he was soon going to learn of all the things he’d missed out on while he was in rehab for eight weeks. For whatever reason, the facility had suggested that family not have contact with him during his time there. He didn’t know that Charlotte and Ethan were engaged, soon to marry; he didn’t know that I had moved to Bridgeport or that Steph and I had gotten an apartment together.

“Yeah. We can catch up on Friday after I come get you. What time do I need to be there?”

“Around eleven; is that okay?”

“Sure, Trev. I’ll see you Friday.”

“Thanks! See you then.”

I hung up and immediately looked at Steph. “It was really him?”

I nodded. “He asked me if I could pick him up at the rehab facility Friday.”

“You look surprised.”

“I kind of am; I wasn’t sure how he was going to react towards me after he got out.”

“Why?”

“I was the one that saw him at his worst, Charlotte did some, but he got so much worse that night in the hospital and he was still in bad shape when he arrived at the rehab facility. It’s sometimes embarrassing for people to be around the person who saw them at their worst. Some don’t remember it, but from what Trev was telling me about his dream, hallucination, whatever it was that he had that night, it was so vivid for him, I figured he would remember enough about that night to possibly be embarrassed by his condition.”

“Wouldn’t that be something they would work on with him there, though?”

I nodded. “Yeah, but treatment isn’t about pushing those or any feelings down, or ignoring them. It’s about realizing that you have certain feelings and learning to deal with them instead of ignoring them. So he could very well have those feelings of embarrassment. It’s such a thin line with him right now and this is going to be hard. He’s going to encounter feelings that he did before he went there and he’s going to, hopefully with help, learn how to deal with those without drinking. What makes it incredibly hard is that the first time he feels those things, he may be tempted to go back to what he did before. It’s insanely hard to break the cycle.”

“Do you think he can?”

I thought for a moment; I really hoped he could. “If there’s one thing that I’m certain of when it comes to Trev is that he’s a tough guy. I think that with the right motivation, support, love, and counseling, he can. But it’s going to take a combination of all of those things.”

She nodded and looked at the ground for a moment. “Well then, I guess we’re just going to have to be there for him; to support and love him.” She declared. I took several steps towards her and put my arms around her.

“You have no idea how much that means to me.” I told her.

Two days later it was Friday morning and I had arrived at the rehab facility around ten thirty. I sat in the lobby area waiting for Trev to come out when I saw my college friend, Dave. I was glad that we were finally getting to see each other after several weeks of just talking on the phone.

“Hey, George!” He said as he came up to me. I stood up and we quickly hugged.

“Hi, Dave! Listen, I just wanted to thank you again for getting Trev in here.”

“No problem. He needed to be here.” He said seriously and gave me a look that let me know that we had made the right decision.

I raised an eyebrow, trying to question him about how Trev was doing knowing that he technically couldn’t tell me anything. He nodded and gave me a thumbs up which instantly gave me a sense of relief.

“You know, if you weren’t fully grown, I’d say you grew since I saw you last.” I heard Trev say and I turned to see him walking up to Dave and me.

“I’ll talk to you later, George.” Dave said excusing himself.

Before I had a chance to respond to Trev, he was giving me a hug. “It’s good to see you.” He said as he hugged me.

I started hugging him back. “You too.” I admitted. We stood like that for several seconds before he pulled back.

“They’re finishing doing discharge stuff so I decided to come see if you were here.” Now that he wasn’t moving, I was able to get a better look at him. He looked good; really good.  Gone were the dark circles from under his eyes, he wasn’t pale anymore, and he had grown a beard and somehow he looked more muscular.

“Did you grow a beard and muscles while you were here?” I kidded with him.

He smiled. “Had some time on my hands and you know me, I don’t read. But they have a pretty sweet workout facility here, so after the first four weeks they cleared me to start working out again. I might have pumped a little iron.” He joked.

“You look great!” I admitted.

“Thanks! You look. . .different. Can’t put my finger on it. Something happen while I was here?”

“We’ll talk after we leave here. Nothing bad.” I reassured him.

“Trevor Davila?” A person at the desk called.

I followed Trev as he walked to the desk. He signed several papers before turning to a couple people standing off to the side and I patiently waited for him as he said goodbye to each one and I noticed him get tearful a couple times. We walked out of the doors together and I looked over at him. “How’s it feel?”

He looked around for a moment before replying. “Odd. Like I’ve been in a bubble for weeks and it just popped.” I nodded and he quickly added. “But good, definitely good.”

“So, have you eaten?” I asked as we approached the car.

“No.”

“Want to stop for lunch somewhere?” I offered.

“That would be great.” He said and as we got in the car I thought about the difference in him. He was still cracking jokes here and there, but he was much more calm and thoughtful than he had been in years; and it made me hopeful. Before Dad had passed away, Trev was a funny, carefree guy. He wasn’t the loud, boisterous person he had become and what I was seeing now was closer to the old Trev.

I drove us to a diner that was halfway between the facility and Bridgeport, neither one of us talking much on our way there. It was an awkward kind of silence, I assumed since neither of us knew what to say to the other. I didn’t have any experience with this sort of thing, I had helped people enter rehab before but had never picked someone up from there. I wasn’t even sure if he really wanted to talk since he hadn’t made any effort since we left.

I pulled into the diner’s parking lot and we entered in silence.

“Just find a seat, fellas. I’ll be with you in a minute.” A lady behind the counter told us.

I motioned for Trev to go first and he picked a booth to sit at. I sat on the other side and soon the server was getting our drink order and we looked over the menus. I made up my mind about what I wanted and closed the menu, choosing to stare outside while I waited for the server to come back. I started to wonder if I had been right; that maybe Trev felt embarrassed around me since I had seen him at his lowest point.

“So, are you going to fill me in on what’s been happening?” I heard him ask and I slowly turned my head to look at him.

“Sure.” I said and after pausing a moment to collect my thoughts, I continued. “Um. . .I guess I’ll start with Charlotte.” He nodded. “Ethan proposed to Charlotte a little over a week after you arrived at the facility. He asked me to lunch the weekend before and asked if the family would have any objections.”

Trev chuckled. “Like anyone would.”

I smiled and continued. “They’re getting married in three weeks.”

“Holy shit! Three weeks?!!” He said loudly and the server looked over at us. “Sorry.” Trev said quietly and she nodded.

“Yeah, it’s crazy.” I admitted. “Good crazy, but still crazy.”

“What about you? What have you been up to?”

For some reason I got a little nervous about telling Trev my news. I knew it was probably silly to feel that way, but I still did. “Well. . .about three weeks ago I made the decision to move to Bridgeport. And then. . .Steph and I bought an apartment together. I got a job at one of the hospitals, I start Monday. And right now we’re staying at Steph’s apartment until the new one is ready to move into, which should be by the end of this coming week.”  I looked over at him when I was done and his mouth was hanging open. 

“So, do you fellas know what you’d like?” The server interrupted us.

“I’ll have a burger, medium well with the fries.” I informed her.

“And for you sweetheart?” She asked looking at Trev.

“Oh. . .I’ll have the same.” He said still in shock.

“I’ll have that out to you soon.” She said and left to turn in our order.

He looked down at the table for several minutes before saying anything. “So you don’t live in Appaloosa anymore.” I shook my head. “And you’re living in Bridgeport with Steph, in her apartment until the apartment you bought together is finished?” I nodded. “And you have a job at one of the hospitals?” I nodded again.

He paused for several seconds. “What are you doing at the hospital?”

“I’ll be counseling people. Helping them accept the loss of a loved one, helping patients work through a diagnosis; things like that.”

He nodded. “Wow.” He whispered. “I figured I had missed out on some things, but. . .” He somewhat smiled. “For a moment there I thought you were going to tell me you and Steph had gotten engaged too.” He admitted and I smiled. “It’s not far off, is it?” He asked.

“I’m working on it.” I admitted.

“God. . .” He again whispered and was interrupted by the server bringing us our food. He didn’t start eating after she left though; instead, he sat there looking down at the table.

“What is it?”

He slowly looked up at me. “I just feel like I’ve missed out on so much. Like I’m somehow disconnected from the family. . .” He admitted.

I sighed. “I can see how you’d feel that way. A lot has happened in the last eight weeks. I don’t think any of us could have guessed that most of this would have occurred. At least what’s happened with me, I had an idea about Ethan and Charlotte, but only because Steph had caught whiff of it.”

He nodded. “I’m not as shocked about Ethan and Charlotte, more so about how little time there is until they get married.”

“Yeah, they aren’t wasting any time.”

“Says the guy who in the span of three weeks left home, bought a place with his girlfriend and got a new job. . .” He joked and I was glad to see it.

“Touché.”

“So what happened? I mean I know that you and Steph had gotten together but what made it change to something so serious?”

“I stopped fighting it. I stopped being afraid of what would happen if I gave in to the feelings I had for her.”

“You were afraid?” Trev asked in disbelief.

I nodded. “Yeah, I was. I was afraid that I couldn’t trust my feelings after what happened with Christine.”

He got a disgusted look on his face. “I’m sorry, George, but I couldn’t stand her. The few times I was around her. . .she just never seemed genuine.”

“I know. But I didn’t see that then, which was part of the reason that I worried about trusting my feelings. Once I did, it didn’t take me long to realize what I have.”

Trev looked back down at the table and nodded. “I’m happy for you.” He said as he looked back up at me.

“Thanks.” I said and we fell into another silence as we ate or food.

I eventually thought to the dinner we had planned and wondered if we had made a mistake planning it. “Umm. . .Trev?” He looked at me, waiting for me to continue. “We kind of all thought that it might be nice to have a quiet dinner at your place tonight. Just Mom, Charlotte, Ethan, Steph and me. We don’t have to though. . .”

“You all are making me dinner?”

“Yeah. . .” 

“Thanks.” He said and I could have sworn I saw tears in his eyes, the second time I had seen that in just a couple of hours.

“Here’s your bill, no rush to pay.” The server said as she laid the ticket down and before I could grab it, Trev swiped it.

“Trev, I can pay.” I tried to argue with him.

He shook his head and pulled some money out. “No, I at least owe you a meal.” He stated.

“Trev, you don’t owe me anything.”

He raised an eyebrow as he placed the money on the table. The server quickly took the money and soon  came back with the change. We both stood up and quietly made our way out of the diner. As I neared the car, I couldn’t help but sigh. I had hoped that there wouldn’t be any uncomfortableness between Trev and me, but considering our history, I shouldn’t have been surprised. We had never been good at talking to each other and had never really expressed our feelings well; unless it was anger. I had hoped that all of this would have brought us closer, but it seemed to do the opposite; something that I knew was more likely. I fished in my pocket to get my keys out when I was startled by his voice.

“Damn it, George! Are we going to talk about what happened or are we going to keep doing this awkward dance?!” He yelled.

I turned and looked at him completely shocked, not understanding why he wanted to have this conversation in the parking lot of the diner, or even why he was so angry; once again proving that anger seemed to be the only way we could communicate. 

“I don’t think we should do this here.” I admitted.

“Then when? When would be a good time? When will there be a time that isn’t awkward?” He wondered and almost begged me.

I let out an exasperated sigh. “What do you want me to say Trev?”

“Anything! I don’t care! Anything would be better than this silence and forced conversation you’re giving me!” He sighed and lowered his voice. “I would rather listen to you get upset over what happened than this.”

“I’m not going to do that, Trev.” I calmly admitted. There was no reason for me to do that, all it was going to do was bring up angry feelings and the last thing I thought Trev needed right now was to feel guilty over things he said and did while under the influence of alcohol.

“Why?! You’re telling me that you’re not the least bit pissed or upset over what happened, what I said to you, how I acted toward Steph?!”

At the mention of Steph I clenched my jaw. I wasn’t nearly as upset as I had been about what had happened, but I hadn’t had to think about it for weeks. His pushing of the issue wasn’t helping either. He had always known how to push my buttons and get a rise out of me, but I was determined to not give in.

“See! You are! God damn it, George! Why can’t you just let me have it?! I deserve it!”

I shook my head and turned away. I refused to lose it there in that parking lot. “I guess you don’t care then. . .” He quietly said as he looked away.

I whirled back around and wanted to deck him for even suggesting that I didn’t care. “I don’t care?!!! Who was the one that pulled your ass off of the bathroom floor?! Who was the one who made sure you got to the hospital and then to rehab?! Who had to tell Mom that you had a heart attack that night before you got to the hospital?! Don’t give me that bullshit about not caring!!”

He put up his hands. “I’m sorry; I was just trying to get you to talk to me. I know you care.” He admitted.

I looked away and tried to calm myself down. “You’ve changed.” He stated and I quickly turned to look at him. “No, it’s good. You used to apologize when you got angry; like it was wrong. You didn’t do that just now.”

I nodded. “You’ve changed too.” I conceded. “You’re actually expressing how you feel.” 

He nodded. “I learned that I had been pushing a lot of what I was feeling down and when that stopped working I started drinking.” He paused for a moment before continuing. “I also learned that even though a lot of what I did was under the influence of alcohol, the things that I said and did hurt people. I think that was one of the hardest realizations; to know that I can’t take back the things that I did. I wish I could. . .”

“It’s fine, Trev.” I tried to convince him.

“Damn it! Stop telling me it’s okay! It’s not!” He argued with me. “I did some really shitty things and you just want to keep downplaying them!”

In nodded, giving in; if he wanted to have this conversation here, then I was done fighting him. “Yeah, you did.” I looked him square in the eyes. “What you said that night in the club. . .I started to really wonder if I was even able to help people after that. I figured if I couldn’t even help my own brother see what problems he had then who was I to try with others. The last time I felt that way was in high school when people used to make fun of me for trying to help people all the time. The same people that you stood up to for me! But now you were sounding just like them. I was so. . .shaken by what you said. . .If it hadn’t been for Steph, I don’t know what I would have done.”

Before I finished, I once again saw him fight back tears and as he responded, they started making their way down his cheeks. “I know.” He whispered. “I’m so, so sorry George. I don’t expect you to forgive me. I did the one thing that Dad said he’d be disappointed in us if we did it to each other, I made you feel bad for who you are; even after you stuck by me through everything and helped me through this. No matter what I did, you helped me; and what did I do? I made fun of you for it. I was an ass; a gigantic ass.”

He looked down at the ground for a moment before continuing. “I’m convinced that I died that night George.” I tried to argue with him. “I know how you feel, but I disagree. I saw him George, he was real. He couldn’t or wouldn’t talk to me but he was as real as you are standing right here in front of me. For whatever reason, my heart started beating again and I was given another chance; and I made a promise to myself that if I got the chance, I would make sure you knew how much I appreciated you and am so thankful that you are who you are. If it wasn’t for you, I’m convinced I would be dead right now.” He paused again and looked me in the eye. “As far as I’m concerned, I owe you a hell of a lot more than a lunch.”

As the tears started to fall down my cheeks I thought I felt a hand near my shoulder. I glanced at the spot and over my shoulder, but I didn’t see anything. My mind began to race as I tried to figure out what had caused that sensation but I was soon distracted by the wind blowing. The gust of wind had come from nowhere and I looked up at the sky to see if there were any storm clouds. There were none though, and as I continued to stare up at the sky I felt someone hugging me and soon realized it was Trev. I started to hug him back and the two of us stood in the parking lot hugging and crying. I couldn’t remember a time that we had ever done that, not even after Dad passed away. There had been moments that as a family we had, but Trev and I had never cried and hugged each other. His arms eventually loosened and he smacked my back several times before pulling away.  “Love you, little bro.”

“Love you too.” I said as I realized that we had once again done something that wasn’t common for us. We probably should have said it more to each other, but for some reason we hadn’t. I saw him look over at the diner and he somewhat smiled.

“We uh. . .might want to get moving.” He said as he looked back at me.

“Why?”

“Cause there’s some people in the diner staring at us, probably wondering if they need to call the cops. . .”

I looked over at the diner and sure enough, there were quite a few people looking at us. “I think you might be right.” I admitted. We got back in the car and it wasn’t long before we were in Bridgeport and pulling up to Trev’s apartment. As the doors to the elevator opened I looked over at Trev and smiled. “Welcome home, Trev.”

“It’s good to be back.” He said and smiled right before walking into the living room.

“Trev!!” Mom cried out as we walked through the door. She ran over to him and almost knocked him over hugging him.

He chuckled. “It’s good to see you too.” He said as he hugged her back.

As Mom and him quit, Charlotte was ready to take Mom’s place. “I hear congratulations are in order.” Trev said as they hugged.

She nodded and hugged him even longer than Mom did.

“Goodness, Charlotte, let him breathe.” Mom advised.

“Sorry.” She said as they pulled apart. “I missed you.” She said to Trev.

“I missed you too.” He said and then looked over at Ethan. “I’m glad she finally gave in. I was rooting for you.” 

Ethan laughed as he and Trev shook hands. “Thanks.”

He turned to look at Steph next and I honestly wasn’t sure what their interaction was going to be like. I knew Steph wasn’t upset with him, but after the talk Trev and I had at the diner, I knew he still felt bad about it. 

I was somewhat surprised that Steph walked up to him and hugged him. It was obvious Trev was shocked too since it took him a moment to hug her back. When they broke apart, Steph looked up at him and gave a nod with her head before walking over to me. I put my arm around her and felt that I needed to admit my offense. “So I started to worry about us having dinner tonight, so I might have let Trev know about it. . .”

Everyone turned and looked at me, completely shocked. “Oh. . .my. . .God! You never give away secrets or surprises!” Charlotte scolded me.

“Hey, don’t blame him. I can be very convincing.” Trev tried to cover for me.

“Since when?” Charlotte joked.

As Mom, Charlotte, Ethan, and Trev sat in the living room, Steph and I went to work on dinner.

“So, it took you longer to get back than you thought. . .” Steph hinted as we worked side-by-side in the kitchen.

I nodded. “We might have had a discussion about things.” 

“A discussion?” I should have known she'd know differently.

“We talked through some things; he got upset, I got upset, he apologized, we hugged, and we might have almost had the police called on us.”

She nodded. “I hope I get to hear the whole story later. . .”

I walked up behind her and put my arms around her. “I promise, I’ll tell you all about it, later.” I said and kissed her on the cheek. She smiled and we continued to prepare dinner.

We were soon sitting around the table that Charlotte and Ethan had gotten and the questions started to fly at Trev.

“So, when are you going back to work?” Mom asked.

“The team has set up a press conference for Wednesday afternoon. They’re going to announce that I’m still on the team but that I’ve lost the starting quarterback position. Which, I’m fine with; I’m more surprised that they kept me on the team at all. They told me last time that if I had to go into rehab again that they would kick me off the team. So at this point, I’m just grateful for another chance.”

“Do you think you’ll be starting quarterback again?” Charlotte asked.

He shrugged. “I don’t know. I know I’m going to work my ass off and if that still means that I’m not starting, then at least I know I gave it everything I’ve got. I’m honestly just thankful for the chance. But I’ll do the press conference on Wednesday, and I’ll start working out with the team again the next Monday.”

“You can do it; I know you can.” Mom said. We all nodded in agreement and he looked down at the table.

“I appreciate it.”

“Are you worried about, the influence of other teammates?” Charlotte asked and I shot her a warning look.

“It’s okay, George.” He looked at me before turning his attention back to Charlotte. “Yes, but that’s what counseling is for, and my sponsor. I know I’ll be tempted to drink. It’s one day at a time and I’ve got support this time that I didn’t have before.”

As we finished dinner, I found myself looking over at Trev and thinking about how proud I was of him.  I was also pleasantly surprised. I had hoped that since he had spent eight weeks in rehab that this time would be different from the other two times. Everything from his demeanor to the look in his eyes was showing that this time was indeed different. I didn’t want to completely get my hopes up, but I was definitely convinced that him recovering was possible. We spent the next couple hours talking in the living room before Charlotte, Ethan, Steph and I made or exit. Mom was spending the weekend with Trev so we said goodbye to them and then Steph and I waited for the elevator in the hallway. I was somewhat stunned when I heard Trev call my name.

“Thanks for coming to get me today.” He offered.

“It wasn’t a big deal, Trev.” I tried to reason with him.

“It was to me.” He seriously stated and I knew I shouldn’t argue with him about it. It obviously did mean something to him.

I nodded. “You’re welcome.” He once again hugged me and I returned it. “I’m proud of you, Trev.” I said and he squeezed me even more.

When we stopped I looked at him. “If you need anything. . .”

“I’ll call you.” He said. “I’ll see you at dinner Wednesday night.” He said and walked back into the living room. 

I looked over at Steph and she started pleading with me. “Now will you tell me what happened after you picked him up?”

I nodded, and the rest of the way back home I told her what happened and how I thought that Trev may have finally come home for good.