Bridgette - Chapter Three: Are You Really That Blind?

I'm giving this chapter a PG-13 rating since there is a moment where mature behavior is suggested (well, maybe more than suggested). Still, I just wanted to warn people; even though there's a warning when you enter the blog.

To say I was pleasant company during the drive home after school that day would be the most massive lie in history. I drove with both hands on the wheel and both eyes forward. I had just lived through the worst school day I had ever had. Charlie of course tried to cheer me up by making some joke, but he failed, horribly.

We arrived at the house and I wanted nothing more than to lock myself in my room. I slammed my car door shut and didn’t bother to wait for Charlie, Kate, and Jeff.

I heard Kate tell Charlie to let me be before I walked through the door.  I was wishing and praying that I would make it to my room without being noticed by Mom or Dad. I crept up the stairs and rushed to my bedroom.

I closed the door quietly and locked it. All I could do was stand there leaning against my door in shock about the day I had just had.

I couldn’t help feeling that I was losing my best friend. I knew I didn’t want that to happen but I knew if I kept trying to persuade Carson that dating Waverly was a bad idea, I was probably going to lose him as my best friend.

I guess I’m just going to have to get over it and hope that their relationship doesn’t last too long. In the meantime, I’ll just try to get along with Waverly. Who knows, maybe I’ll see what Carson thinks is so great about her. . .Who am I kidding.  I chuckled to myself. I will probably never understand what Carson’s fascination with her is. But sometimes you gotta take one for the team and this was one of those times.

As I sat down at my desk to do my homework, I tried to come up with a plan to persuade Carson that everything really was okay between the two of us and Waverly and me.

 I was about halfway done with my homework when I heard Charlie and Jeff’s door shut and then there was a bang on the wall that was between our two rooms. I rolled my eyes and got up.

“Hey! Whoever’s in there, shut up! I’m trying to do homework in here!” I shouted as I banged on the wall. I heard the muffled sound of voices and then it was quiet.

Good! After the day I’ve had I don’t want to have to deal with either of them being their obnoxious selves.  I loved my brothers but they were, you know, teenage guys and could sometimes be the most annoying creatures on the planet. 

I sat back down at my desk and started to work on my homework again. After a couple minutes I heard a loud thud on the ground that sounded like it came from the guys’ room again. That’s it! They’ve picked the wrong day to mess with me. I stood up and stomped out my door and then right next door to their room. Without hesitation I flung the door open and started going off on whoever was in the room.

“I don’t care what you’re doing in here! I’m over there trying to actually do homework and you’re in here making all kinds. . .of. . .” I almost screamed at what I saw. In front of me, on the floor, was my other best friend and my brother in a position I never thought I’d see them in.

For a few seconds we were all frozen from shock.  Once it registered what I was seeing, I covered my mouth and ran into my room trying not to scream from the horror of seeing my best girlfriend and my brother together.

I sat on my bed hugging my knees when I heard a knock on the door.

“Bridge, can we come in?” I heard Kate ask from the other side of the door. Before I could answer Charlie was flinging the door open.

“Why are you asking her when she doesn’t even bother to knock herself. This whole situation could have been avoided if she had.”

I narrowed my eyes at him and stood up. “Don’t you dare blame this on me!” I was trying my best to not talk too loud since I didn’t want Mom and Dad rushing up stairs. “I’m not the one getting it on with our best friend.  What is this?! The day of “Let’s keep the fact that your best friends are dating people and haven’t bothered to tell you day?! I assume you all are dating, right? Or is this a sometimes thing with the two of you? And exactly how long has this been going on behind my back.” I looked over at Kate when I said the last part.

She put her head down and mumbled an answer I couldn’t understand.

“I’m sorry? What’s that? I can’t understand your mumbling.”

“She said since this summer after Scarlett was born. And dammit Bridge, stop being such a drama queen about everything! We’ve all had a lot to deal with this summer and have been walking on eggshells trying to protect each other.  We knew you were having a difficult time with, well, Carson this summer and we didn’t want to add to your problems. It wasn’t done to piss you off.”

I looked back and forth between them and I couldn’t help it, I started crying. Kate came over to me and put her arm around me.  “This has been one of the worst days I have ever had.”

“Finding out that we’re dating is one of the worst things for you?” Charlie looked like he was going to explode.

“No, I was trying to explain this to Carson earlier today. It’s not so much that you all are dating or even who it is, it’s that you didn’t tell me. For whatever reason, you didn’t.  We’re all supposed to be friends and it just feels like right now everyone is keeping things from me.”

“Charlie, do you mind if I talk to Bridge alone?” Charlie looked at Kate and he smiled sweetly at her. I had never seen him look at a girl like that and it actually kind of warmed my heart.

"Sure. As long as Bridge promises to be nice.”

“Oh good grief Charlie! She is my best friend you know.” I reminded him.

“All right.” He looked one more time at Kate and I noticed her blush. 

I was starting to wonder how I hadn’t noticed the little looks they were giving each other before. Charlie closed the door as he walked out and Kate turned to look at me.

“Bridge, I hope you know we didn’t keep any of this from you because we don’t trust you. If anything, that’s the furthest thing from the truth. It’s like Charlie said, our relationship changed around the time Scarlett was born and we saw how hard it was on you and the rest of the family and we didn’t want to create anymore ripples in peoples’ lives. So we decided to not tell anyone.  We kept waiting for a good time but it just didn’t seem to present itself.”

 “But Charlie?! I mean, how can you even look at him and be even remotely attracted to him?!”

“Oh Bridge, of course you look at him like that! He’s your brother.  I think he and I had been fighting our feelings for each other for a while. It took the shock of the events this summer to help us realize that it wasn’t worth fighting our feelings anymore.”

“But aren’t you worried about what will happen to your friendship if things don’t work out?”

“Honestly, no. I mean we did sit down and talk about our feelings
 and that conversation was a little hard just because we kind of had an idea that we each liked each other but neither of us were one hundred percent sure.  But once we got over that hurdle, there’s been no looking back.”

I stood there for a minute thinking about Carson and how we too had had a conversation about our relationship during the summer but it had gone in a completely different direction.

“Wha’cha thinkin about, Bridge?”

“Oh. . .well. . .”

“Carson, right?”

"How is it that you can always read my mind?”

“Bridge, we’ve known each other since we were born in the hospital.”

“Oh, yeah.” I attempted to chuckle. “I just keep thinking about what he said to me today and about how we had a similar conversation about our friendship, relationship, whatever you want to call it, this summer.  We came to a completely different conclusion though.”

“Really? Cause where I’m standing, I just don’t see how that was possible.”

"What do you mean?”

“Oh come on Bridge! He’s been interested in you since our freshman year. Are you really that blind! Sure, he’s a great friend but when you’re not looking, he sneaks glances at you. I thought you knew.”

“No! I mean, I kind of had an idea that he started having feelings for me last year but I didn’t think it went back that far.  He seemed pretty willing to just remain friends when we talked this summer. Are you sure?”

“Yeah Bridge. We’ve all known, we figured you knew but just weren’t interested. I have noticed that he really hasn’t been doing that since about mid-summer though.  Which probably makes you feel a little relieved.”

“I guess. . .I don’t understand something though, why didn’t he mention it when we talked this summer? He acted like it was no big deal that we were just friends.  If he really liked me that much, wouldn’t he have said something?”

“I don’t think I can answer that Bridge. Only Carson can; but maybe he did it because he saw how you felt and he didn’t want to risk losing you as a friend.”

At that moment, it hit me right between the eyes.  “I always put my feelings aside for you. . .” That’s what he had told me earlier.

“Oh God, Kate! I think I just figured out why Carson was so pissed at me today. And, actually, why he’s been distant the last couple of weeks. I think you’re right. I think he may have still had feelings for me and I shot him down this summer. Even worse, I didn’t even bother to think about how he felt. I told him how I felt and then I didn’t really give him an opportunity to tell me. I just assumed he felt the same; and honestly, I didn’t care if he didn’t. I just didn’t want to deal with it then and tried to shove it under a rug, or hide it in a closet.  No wonder he’s so mad at me.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Bridge. Your family has had a tough summer. I’m sure that’s why he decided to not let you know how he felt; not because you didn’t give him an opportunity to tell you.”

But as I laid in bed later that night, I couldn’t help shake the feeling that Kate was wrong. She wasn’t there the day Carson and I had our talk. I had rushed through telling Carson how I felt and when he quickly agreed, I immediately carried on like nothing had happened. 

Maybe this is why you haven’t really had a boyfriend yet?  My conscience was doing its best to make me feel even worse.  What, the fact that I seem to be oblivious about a guy liking me?

No, the fact that you are so absorbed in yourself and how you feel. Wow, thanks for the confidence boost there conscience.  But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that maybe there was some truth to that statement.  Man, do I owe Carson a big apology.

I laid awake most of the night trying to think about how to apologize to him. I definitely owed him one and I figured it wouldn’t hurt to apologize again for giving him a hard time for dating Waverly. There had to be some good reason he was dating her, so I needed to find out what that was and go with it.

The next morning I woke up and got ready for school. I almost ran into Charlie as I was getting breakfast and my face blushed when I looked at him. It was going to take me awhile to get the sight of him and Kate out of my brain.

As we finished breakfast, Kate came over and Charlie stood up. He walked over to Kate and cleared his throat. “Everyone, we have something we’d like to say.”

We all stopped eating and looked at them. “We figured now was a good time to tell you that we’re dating and have been for several months.”

I will never forget Mom’s response. “Well, it’s about time you finally told us! We’ve known the whole time but we’re waiting for you to tell us.”

Mom and Dad got up and hugged them.

Charlie looked at Jeff “Did you know bro?”

“Uh. . . yeah. I think everyone did. It was pretty obvious.”

I had never felt so ashamed. Everyone had noticed, but me. Was I really so self-absorbed that I didn’t pay attention to the people I loved?

“Well, we better get going to school. Come on Bridge and Jeff.” Charlie and Kate walked toward the front door and Jeff and I grabbed our stuff.

“Bye kids! Have a great day!” Mom called out after us.

I drove all of us to school and couldn’t help but sneak glances at Charlie and Kate in the rearview mirror. I could tell they were holding hands and they kept looking at each other, smiling. I still couldn’t get over the fact that I was so blind that I didn’t even see that they were together.

After arriving at school Charlie, Kate and I headed over to our normal before school meeting spot. Carson and Waverly were already there. I noticed how once again, as I walked up to them, Waverly moved closer to Carson. I tried to brush it off.

Carson looked over at Charlie and Kate and got a big smile on his face. “Finally decided to let the cat out of the bag, huh?” Charlie and Kate were holding hands and it seemed that quite a few people in school were noticing.

“Yeah, did you know too? We were trying so hard to keep it quiet. I thought we had done a great job.” Charlie told him.

“Are you kidding?! Anyone would have noticed the glances between the two of you.  If anything, you did a really bad job.” Once again, I was being shown how oblivious I was to everything. I looked up at Waverly and she was looking at me.

“So, Waverly, we all had talked this summer about having a back to school party at our house. It’s going to be this Saturday and of course, you’re more than welcome to come.” As soon as the words left my mouth, everyone turned and looked at me like I had lost it. I mean, I was really trying to be nice to her.

“Oh. . .that’s really nice of you Bridgette. Thanks.”

“No problem. And please don’t call me Bridgette. People only call me that when I’m in trouble.” I glanced really quick at Carson then looked back at Waverly.  “Just fair warning, Trent is known for tossing people in the pool so make sure you wear a swimsuit.”

“Oh man! Do you remember the time that he threw Julia in the pool? I thought she was going to kill him!”

We all started walking to our classes when I felt a hand on my arm. “Bridge?” I turned to look and it was Carson. “Thanks for trying with Waverly.”

“No problem. That’s what friends do. But you and I definitely need to sit down and talk about what happened yesterday.”  We kept walking and I thought about how that was a conversation I was not thrilled about having.